On Sunday Morning, I Took Out the Bicycle on the Balcony

On Sunday morning I opened my eyes and the sky outside was clear. While I was drinking drip coffee, my eyes met the bicycle standing on the balcony. I had ridden it once in early summer and left it there ever since. A thin layer of dust sat on the saddle, and the tires were pressed flat. It was a spot I saw every time I opened the balcony door, so pretending not to notice it took quite some effort.

I hadn't decided to ride it. I only picked up a rag to wipe off the dust, and somewhere along the way I found myself pumping air into the tires. While I pressed the pump, I thought about how long I had been ignoring this bicycle. At first I said it was too hot, then that I was too busy, but really, the more days I didn't ride it, the harder it became to start again. The thought crept up on me: what if I wobbled on the road, what if after so long my body had forgotten everything.

Wherever you go

I stood the bicycle by the front door and opened still().

Haven’t I commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Don’t be afraid. Don’t be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.

Joshua 1:9 (WEB)

I know it was originally said to someone facing a great battle. Set beside my Sunday morning, it is far too grand. Still, the words "wherever you go" stayed in my eyes for a long time. I read them as meaning every place one goes, whether the road is strange or familiar. Reading this verse doesn't make me ride well on its own. I might fall, or I might be back in ten minutes. Still, I thought I could set down for a moment the feeling that I have to ride well. For today, it was enough not to go far but to roll the wheels once.

I put on my helmet and decided to go around the apartment complex just once. For the first few meters the handlebars wobbled, but around the second corner my body remembered. The wind passed by my ears, and a few leaves scattered in front of the wheel. I stopped after one lap, a little out of breath. I could have gone further, but I decided that was enough for today. As I stood the bicycle back up, I lowered the saddle by one notch. It seemed I would be able to ride a little more comfortably next time. Back upstairs, while finishing my cold coffee, I could still feel the handlebars in my palms. It was the only thing I had done today, yet Sunday felt a little wider than usual.

Today's breath — Before you step out, stand at the door, breathe in once deeply, and let it out slowly.